Mars and Venus Starting Over
Mars and Venus Starting Over By John Gray
Publisher: HarperAudio 1998-06-01 | ISBN: 0694519766 | Language English | Audio Cassette in MP3 | 45 mb
MEN ARE FROM MARS AND WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS, BUT THE PAIN OF STARTING OVER IS UNIVERSAL.
When we lose a love, it seems as if the world has truly come to an end. We feel that we'll never recover, never fall in love again, and perhaps never again feel the joy life used to provide. And as distressing as these feelings are, they are actually quite useful - an integral part of the healing process we must experience in order to be whole and ready to love again. As Dr. John Gray tells us, by shutting down the feelings of hurt, pain, and loneliness, we are actually hindering our recovery.
Now with his extraordinary insight and wisdom, Dr. Gray, bestselling author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, explores the process of starting over after the loss of a love relationship, examining how men and women respond differently, and which kind of reactions foster healing, growth and openness to love'and which ones keep us closed off and unable to share our love.
For anyone who has ever experienced the pain and loss of separation, Dr. Gray's brilliant work will open your eyes to the behavioral patterns that have kept you from moving on, and show you the way to open your heart once again to the joy and love that you want, need - and deserve.
Read by the author.
A breakup, divorce, or loss of a loved one isn't just the end of your relationship with that person. It's a continuation of every feeling of abandonment you've ever suffered. It's the loss of a system of approval you'd come to depend on. The struggle, as Gray points out in Starting Over, isn't just to find a new partner, but to get over those feelings of abandonment or loss or anger or whatever else gets dredged up by the end of a relationship.
Perhaps the book's most crucial chapter posits that the best way to get over the loss of love is to focus on the quot;lovequot; more than the quot;loss.quot; That may seem impossible, especially if the bum took off with your best friend, your life savings, and your Lyle Lovett CDs, but Gray didn't get to be a household name because the advice in his Venus and Mars books doesn't work. Remembering only the bad parts, Gray says, leaves you with an important part of your emotional being closed to new business.
As for the Venus and Mars stuff, that comes in the second half of the book, when Gray looks at how men and women start new relationships from different points of view, with different priorities (a man might want to have fun with no strings attached; a woman might carry with her a lengthy list of requirements for her next partner, a list that excludes virtually all available men).
If you've never read Gray's work before, you have to be prepared to check your cynicism at the door. This is earnest stuff, but it's also based on decades of experience counseling clients. He's not one of those photogenic, nine-times-divorced shrinklets who's telling you how to conduct your relationships without any real clue of what makes love last. This is the real package: nothing glib, nothing quick and easy, nothing you could've figured out from a quot;Love Isquot; cartoon.
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